A mother’s guilt…

As I sit here in the dentist office waiting to be called back I have an overwhelming feeling of guilt. He’s 16 years old and I still secretly hold myself accountable for even the health of his mouth. “If only I had been a better mother, maybe he wouldn’t be here today. If I still reminded him to brush the tooth in the cleft everyday, then maybe he wouldn’t be getting a root canal.” Being a mother is the biggest blessing God has given me. I take motherhood seriously. I don’t want to ever take it for granted. I will strive to be the best I can be for His children. I am forever grateful that He has entrusted me with their lives while we’re on earth. I know satan is attacking me. I know this guilt is an attempt to destroy my self worth. It won’t work. He won’t win. My God will strengthen me. My God loves me. My God is alive!

She is clothed in strength and dignity and she laughs without fear of the future. Proverbs 31:25

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There is HOPE

I know first hand what it feels like to have a child that is born with a facial deformity. My son was born with cleft lip and palate 16 years ago. The trials and tribulations these children and their families go through can be very trying. Most of them will face many medical obstacles. My son had chronic ear infections, major dental issues, extensive orthodontic work, and years of speech therapy. He has endured numerous surgeries: two nasal tip rhinoplasty; three cleft lip repairs; two cleft palate repairs; a bone graft; removal of his pharyngeal flap and several sets of PE tubes. This July he will have a mid-face distraction osteogenesis surgery. Next summer, he will have his upper and lower jaw surgeries. Six months after he has completely recovered from the jaw surgeries, he will have a complete nasal rhinoplasty and his FINAL lip repair. In addition to the many medical issues, years of bullying and social rejection have taken a toll on his self-image. In his younger years, he wasn’t all that concerned with his outward appearance. As he’s matured, he’s become more sensitive to others perceptions. His high school years have been particularly tough. He covers his lip when we’re in public places. He wears a neck warmer over his face even on warm days. As his mother, I wish nothing more than for him to see himself as I see him. I see a handsome, sweet, NORMAL teenage boy. My prayer is that one day SOON, he will look in the mirror, and see what I see. I have had my heart ripped apart as I have watched him struggle, helplessly at times. As hard as the struggles have been, they have also been a HUGE blessing. We are with an amazing cleft lip and palate team. They give everything they have to ensure my son receives the medical attention he needs. Their guidance and compassion have been gifts from God. There are many less fortunate who don’t have the option of basic medical treatment much less the special care cleft patients require. This is why I’m such a huge believer in Operation Smile. They perform thousands of surgeries for adults and children worldwide who do not have the means to do so on their own. I read about a 63-year-old lady that lived her entire life inside her home because the ridicule of having a hole in her face was too much for her to bear. Even after decades as a social outcast, there is always hope. Hope to help redeem the respect, dignity, and life everyone deserves. Thanks to Operation Smile’s amazing medical volunteers, she could finally smile with confidence. Many children can’t attend school because their culture believes their facial deformity is a curse. Their parents have to keep them hidden in their homes. There is no reason for these precious children to live their lives as outcast haunted by shame. A $240.00, 45 minute operation, will change their lives forever. Because of Operation Smile children will be able to uncover their faces and be proud of who they are. Their broken smiles will become whole. Their lives will be better and their hope will be restored. Please help give a child a new smile. Help spare them a life full of shame. Help them see the beautiful child God created them to be.

God Bless

To donate to Operation Smile, click the link and then click donate! DONATE HERE

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20140422-124839.jpg I met sweet Edwin while on the mission field in Nicaragua. Operation Smile performed his surgery.